Sunday, April 29, 2012

No Bull - A SEC Football Story

In 1992, Mississippi State opened their season against Texas.  They were a two-touchdown underdogs.  Coach Jackie Sherrill asked his players what a steer was and none of them knew.  To motivate his players, he asked them, "People say (the Texas mascot) is a longhorn steer. Is that a bull, or is he a steer?"

As part of the motivation process, he had his team view the castration of "Wild Willie," erstwise a bull before the most unkindest cut was made.  The motivational part worked in spades: -- Mississippi State, a two-point underdog, won 28-10.

After being widely criticized, Sherrill offered a quarter-hearted apology.
"Even though I was not involved in the procedure that took place, I take responsibility," he said. "If this incident was in any way not perceived as proper by those who love Mississippi State, then I apologize."

But who did he apologize to?  Mississippi State fans and students?  Animal lovers?  [This was before PeTA.]   In te highly competitive SEC, good results are hard to overlook.  As a Bulldog fan commented, "Where can we get a Crimson Tide or a Volunteer?"

If anyone needed to be apologized to, it was Wild Willie.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Monday, April 23, 2012

Alabama Bans Beer Brand

From azcentral:

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. -- You can buy Fat Bastard wine in Alabama, but you'll have to go elsewhere for Dirty Bastard beer.

The state alcoholic beverage control agency said Thursday it has banned Dirty Bastard beer because of profanity on its label. But the maker, Michigan-based Founders Brewing Co., can appeal the decision to the agency's board.

The state allows the sale of Fat Bastard wine. But board attorney Bob Martin says the brand was approved years ago, and he doesn't know the circumstances.
Alabama gained notice a few years ago for banning a wine brand that featured a nude nymph on its label. Its decision on the beer is opposed by Free The Hops, a group that advocates for new beer brands in Alabama.


Read more: http://www.azcentral.com/offbeat/articles/2012/04/19/20120419alabama-bans-beer-brand-over-dirty-name.html#ixzz1sXf7kdPS

I suddenly have a desire to drink Dirty Bastard beer.  The ABC Board is a bunch of asshat mossbacks.

Friday, April 20, 2012

This Can Go Either Way

The Alabama legislature, in its infinite wisdom, is considering a bill that would allow for covenant marriages in Alabama.  One of the Republican Senators, Phil Williams, proposed this in response to Alabama's high divorce rate -- the fourth highest in the U.S.!  This would complicate things if couples going in for this type of marriage were to consider divorce in the future.  


One other state, Louisiana, has this type of provision.  However, most Louisiana marriages are of the ordinary (noncovenant) type; there were fewer than 300 of them for over 11,000 marriages in 2010.  There, marriages are likely to be performed as a religious ritual; and the state's covenant marriage option may be simply beside the point.


The legislature should have better ways of spending their time and more important matters than this.  This is political grandstanding to suck up to the mossbacks.


Is she taking her top off or tieing it up?  One can hope.  I hope the legislature reconsiders this worthless legislation.


Sunday, April 15, 2012

The Girls of Ukraine


FEMEN ladies in a protest.  They're demure for this one.

I really wish them well.  While their method is provocative, what they're protesting deserves to be protested.

You go, Ukrainian girls!

Thursday, April 12, 2012

How I Got My Screen Name

While at a party during my Auburn years, a girl got drunk and put her bra on my head.  I did a dance with her while wearing it, and the nickname stuck.   War Eagle!   She was topless.  Auburn parties could be wild sometimes. 

Truth to tell -- I had a few, myself.


I figured you'd rather look at pretty girls wearing bras on their heads . . . .



Saturday, April 7, 2012

We Need a Moratorium on String Bikinis

It saddens me to say this, but as much as I like them, they can be darned distracting to weak-minded legislators.

Several years ago, Miss California Carrie Prejean (remember her?), bless her heart, was asked to extemporize a response to a question regarding gay marriages, and she opined that "marriage should be between opposites," that is, a man and a woman.  Now no right-minded person should object to a pretty lady's views, but it raised a firestorm of invective. As if we were not with a full plate already: dealing back then with a recession, pirates, and even now the swine flu!

Our amazing Alabama legislature got into the act. despite the fact that they have not as yet passed the General Fund or Education budgets, an ethics bill, or dealt with the shortfall of revenues or even the questionable Sweet Home Alabama legislation (as some farmer john singers in the t.v. ad supporting it call it) regarding casino gambling, took time out to pass a resolution praising her for her stand!

Amazing priorities, folks! We paid those guys for that?

My view is either that they are attention whores who wish to ride the coattails of her notoriety, or they got distracted b a hot chick in a string bikini.

I'm afraid it was the latter. A well-placed one does that for me, too.

Now I'm just a lowly engineer; and others check my designs and calculations. But those birds are neglecting the common welfare when they get off course.

Therefore, I ask that, for the good of proper government and social welfare that all women refrain from wearing string bikinis while the Alabama Legislature in in session. We can have Governor Bentley proclaim that doubly happy day the official Green Light to String Bikinis Day!

And we can be doubly pleased that the Legislature is off session!


Carrie Prejean

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Kunoichi

Kunoichi are female ninjas.  Here's a helpful guide to their taxonomy.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Monday, April 2, 2012

Sexy Ninja

It is a little-known fact that ninjas born in the Year of the Dog are incredibly sexy: