Engineer Joke I

An electrical engineer, mechanical engineer, and software engineer are on their way to a trade show when their car stalls and they are forced to pull over to the side of the road.

The mechanical engineer says, "It’s probably a mechanical problem. I'll get my tool box out of the trunk and I can fix it."

The electrical engineer says, "No, I'll bet it's an electrical problem. I have my multimeter with me and I'll go check it out."

Finally, the software engineer says, "I have the solution! Let's all get out of the car and then get back in. I'll bet we'll be back on the road in no time."

Daisy Dukes

Daisy Dukes, both the television character and the style of cut-off denim shorts, was an appealing aspect of the South that emerged in the 1980's, when at least some of America was disposed to find something good in it.

Hooray for Daisy Dukes!  Here's actress Audrina Partridge looking mighty comfortable and beautiful in a pair of Daisy Dukes.

Best Beer and the Presidential Race

The U.S. presidential debates are like a "Best Beer in America" contest where only Bud Light and Coors Light are invited.

http://www.thestreet.com/story/11638722/1/want-to-see-gary-johnson-and-jill-stein-debate-heres-why-you-wont.html

Kathy Ireland

A Great Butt

I will not equivocate: There is nothing better than a Alabama pulled barbecue pork butt using a spicy barbecue sauce, some hush puppies, barbecue beans, and lots of beer!  And an Auburn football game on television. 

Guy Fieri makes a nice sauce.  And I like the sauce from Dreamland.

Dreamland and Archibald's is wasted on Tuscaloosa, but they have primo b-b-q.  I'm glad Dreamland is located elsewhere, including in Huntsville.

Then there's Sweet Bone Alabama: great barbecue, if you can get past the name.

In Honor of Sen. Harry Reid

Dry Counties

Let's look at that Southern phenomena, the "dry" county, where alcoholic beverages cannot be sold.

Here's Alabama's "wet" counties (in blue) and "dry" counties in yellow.  And some dry counties, like Lauderdale, have "wet" cities (marked with a single X, like Florence).

Some counties, like Madison, have it so that draft beer is sold.  These are marked with a double X.

Blame the W.C.T.U. (see Heidi's blog) and the mossback Fundamentalists for these weird laws.

http://transplantedtennesseean.blogspot.com/2012/08/the-womens-christian-temperance-union.html

The Big Bang

Here's the THeme Song from The Big Bang Theory:


Our whole universe was in a hot dense state,

Then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait...

The Earth began to cool,

The autotrophs began to drool,

Neanderthals developed tools,

We built a wall (we built the pyramids),

Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery,

That all started with the big bang!


[The TV theme ends here. The song continues:]


Since the "Dawn of Man" is really not that long,

As every galaxy was formed in less time than it takes to sing this song.

A fraction of a second and the elements were made.

The bipeds stood up straight,

The dinosaurs all met their fate,

They tried to leave but they were late

And they all died (they froze their asses off)

The oceans said, "Pangaea,

See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!"

Set in motion by the same big bang!

It all started with the big BANG!

It's expanding ever outward but one day

It will pause then start to go the other way,

Collapsing ever inward, we won't be here, it won't be heard.

Our best and brightest figure that it'll make an even bigger bang!

[Instrumental]

Australopithecus would really have been sick of us,

Debating how we're here; they're catching deer (we're catching viruses)

Religion or astronomy, Descartes or Deuteronomy

It all started with the big bang!

Music and mythology, Einstein and astrology

It all started with the big bang!

It all started with the big ... BANG!